Distinguishing Greatness

Sometimes, ok, a lot of times, I find myself thinking, "Ok yeah, yeah, right, I get it, you are cooler than me, whatever." I mean come on- if you find yourself incessantly bragging or showing off all the things you have, or do, and replying to other people's comments with your own fabulousity (thanks Kimora Lee Simmons for that word) then guess what- You are really aren't that great. You are, however, great if you:
-Do cool, eccentric, fun, original things for yourself and not so you can brag all over the internet and everywhere else about them.
-Listen respectfully to other people and don't reply to them or their story with something that starts with "Well I..." or "For me..." or something of the sort.
-Don't spend more money than you have.
-Don't pick up on a hobby because it's cool right now and you want to be able to blog about it.
I find it so refreshing to be around people who are just themselves. They aren't trying to portray perfectness or some sort of facade about what their life is. I mean come one, we all know it isn't possible. And to be honest no one can really be friends with someone who appears to be so perfect. I mean who wants to surround themselves with perfection??? I believe in life, especially being a female, it all comes down to self confidence. The more secure in yourself that you are, the more you can fess up to what and who you really are. Am I a perfect advocate for this, heavens no, I mean it just took me about six tries to spell advicate, I mean advocate. I am certainly not saying that I have mastered this technique nor do I think ever will. I think life and our personal security will be ever changing. Every stage in life we go through we are going to have to reassess and find our center. I just think that we should take a step back and look around us and stop trying so hard. After all, your consistent effort can be transparent. Just relax and be who you are. It certainly takes a lot less effort than maintaining the image you are trying to keep up with. I personally find solace in my friends who are so "imperfect". The ones who confess they can't eat out due to financial bondage. The ones who could care less that their kids have muck, whatever that is, all over their faces. The ones who don't run their heads ragged to clean up before I come over (I do this. Not going to lie.)-Quick story: Mother in law shows up Wednesday to go to Sephora with me, says, " Your house is so clean. Did you spend all morning cleaning?" "NO." Says me. (In reality I spent all night the night before cleaning.)
Anyways. I sometimes feel like I am involved in a bunch of competitions I never signed up for. Daily interactions that that are a bunch of comparative competitions and it makes me want to not partake of these interactions anymore. I find myself slowly cutting them out. It just takes to much effort. I'd rather hang out with a toddler who thinks bright green dresses look good with stripped leggings and doesn't care what another soul thinks about it. Especially her mom.

A Mother's Influence

"Later that night I awoke screaming and sweating in a terror of falling, but she came to me and lay down beside me, and the warmth of her body comforted me. Secure in the knowledge of her love, I began to cross over into sleep...Remember this moment, when your mother's body heals every trouble of your soul."

This is a quote from The Red Tent, the quote I was trying to find, Amber, and couldn't. I love this. I love the purpose and importance it puts on a mother. Maybe I am alone in this, but I am so sensitive to motherhood because I am, and was, such a soft, feeling person. I know exactly the meaning and the feeling of the truth in this quote.

On Children
Kahlil Gibran

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let our bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

I love this picture because it is just so, him. Happy to be there with a smile on his face.

HEY STEPH!

To be like his mother. She doesn't even know how capable she is. She is quiet and still. She is unselfish and giving. Too easily affected by untruths. She is calm and patient, takes in every smile of his and savors every sigh. She'll never forget an important moment that he had because she was too busy fussing making sure her house was perfect. She loves him the same even if he isn't dressed in the most trendy attire. That is too far below her. She will sacrifice what she needs to keep him from catching the improbably cold. Who cares what they think, HE is more important. Her priorities are perfect and right. See her for what she is, not what you want her to be. She stands tall, moves with class, speaks with grace, and thinks often. He is one lucky child.

Yeah I know I haven't posted. Busy, busy, busy. But I did have a really good night last night. I went to my first meeting of my new book club, the last one-whatever happened to that ladies?? Anyway although I didn't get to finish the book all the way I went anyway and it was very refreshing. One thing I really loved first off is getting to sit and have REAL conversation. With girls even. It was awesome. We sat and talked about our thoughts about this book (The Red Tent by Anita Diamant) and went off on tangents about our lives and experiences. It has been such a long time since I sat and talked with other girls (no offense to anyone) about something other than daily tasks, children, husbands, church calling, gardens, cleaning house, or whatever the on surface subject is. I mean, what can be expected, let's be honest we can't just sit down on the phone with blabbering toddlers on one ear and our best friend on the other and expect to really ponder our lives together. So that was what was so beautiful about the night, good conversation, smart educated girls with interesting things to say and the discovery that I really like hummus. Also I loved that it brought a bunch of girls together, who otherwise would not hang out together. I am looking forward to the next one and luckily will have this 6 week long class out of the way so I can finish the stinking book and stop learning about marriage as an interpersonal relationship.